Excerpt from poem Coneflower Sequence by chamrickwriter randomstoryteller with image of coneflower flower head and lavender petals 1042x512 px

Coneflower Sequence (the rewrite)

lavender-lavender-coneflowers-Coker-Arboretum-chamrick writer-randomstoryteller

Reconsidering and revising a poem can take you to a new place. Like many this year, I turned to nature for respite and got a new perspective. Here are two versions of the poem.

2020

Last spring, I wanted something trouble-free

and found it in coneflower seed packets,

buying into the midsummer promise of

self-sowing sun lovers now overrunning

the garden with nature’s lavender turns.

Seed heads bristle symmetry, measure upon

tight measure, Fibonnaci’s weathered tune

luring goldfinches to August feasts.

 

2015

coneflowers spirograph

a foot outside my door—

it is no mean trick,

nature’s lavender turn;

fear of irrational numbers

bow to seed-head symmetry,

measure upon tight measure,

Fibonacci’s weathered tune.

 

Where have you found a fresh point of view? Please share!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

5 Comments

  1. robertcday

    Where have you found a fresh point of view? What an interesting question! Let me think. Hmm. I think eVeRyWhEre! I just wrote a story from a prompt (Crescent Moon). It was my fourth attempt. The others were just dry-biscuit ideas from inside my head, but the one that stuck came from looking at something whilst walking past it and just letting the ideas spark themselves into a life of their own. The first method was an attempt to force something out whereas the method that worked involved, as you (kinda) said, working with something that already existed and making it into something new.
    Anyhoo – I like both versions of your pome, but the second is the oak-matured whisky.
    Are you having a lovely day? 🙂
    Robert

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